Bonjour Mes Amis, Encore,
I was feeling oh so French today, and have for you today a classic French song which I'm sure you all have heard at one time or another, I know I have, although I'm not sure if it is was in this lifetime, or another one. But this adaptation of La Vie en Rose is sung by a more contemporary French - American Chanteuse rather than Edith Piaf, who is most
often associated with this song. As you can see, her name is Madeleine Peyrou. And I might say,I think her rendition is equally as impressive , only in a different sort of way. So I hope you will enjoy it as I go on with my daily musings about quelque choses. It is a beautiful, romantic love song, about how everything is rose colored through her eyes, when her lover takes her in his arms. Oh, how romantic! Quelle Surperbe!
Even though I have never experienced love in the same sense as humans do, now that I have this gift of human consciousness, I think it is something I wish to experience. But how? Zat is ze problem, as a French person speaking English would say . My options are quite limited especially now. In my younger days, I did give birth to a litter of kittens. That memory has come back to me, and it is very painful, because my kittens were taken away from me after such a short time, and then I don't remember much after that. I do know I had an operation so I could not get pregnant again, which was just as well, if I was never going to be able to keep my offspring. Now this is something I did not have a decision in whatsoever. My freedom to choose or not choose was taken from me. My feelings are ambivalent on the subject. On the whole, I do think with the problem of overpopulation in the feline community,it is a good idea. There are so many unwanted cats living on the streets, in feral colonies, and they do not last for very long out there. It is a brutal struggle on a daily basis just to survive. They often get killed off either by cars, disease ,or by humans who will eradicate them without a second thought, just because they consider them to be a nuisance.
And in my case, I did not have the consciousness at the time I became pregnant that I have now. I was not really able to intellectualize what was happening to me at the time. I just remember it as a hazy sensation, a sensation of feeling a lot of emotional and physical pain,separation, and loss. I can only hope that my dear babies, that I never saw even once after they were taken from me , went into good homes,and have had a good life thus far. That is the best I can hope for, and I say a little prayer for them each day, even though I am not a religious cat , by nature. But I feel it can't hurt , just in case there is a God, I don't want to miss out. So I guess this way, my butt is covered in just in case there is a God up there listening to prayers, and making decisions based upon those prayers. Which I doubt, but just in case, better to be safe than sorry.
So as far as romance goes, there was never really any to speak of. The father of my kittens, I don't remember him at all, just vaguely. He was not romantic in the least. It was not a Vie en Rose kind of affair. There was very little effort on his part. He courted me for a brief while, and then Mother Nature just took over. I just went with my urges. And then it was over, and I felt the stirrings inside of me , as new life took form, and it was a lovely feeling, and I enjoyed the first stages of motherhood during, and after the time that they ventured out into the world. But as I said , it was short lived, and it makes me so sad to think I never got to know them.
Who in God's name could I have a romantic relationship with even if I wanted to ? The male cats my age, are rather fragile, and not very masculine. They act more like lapdogs, not appealing in the least. And yes I could consort with a younger male, but then it would serve no further purpose than lust, and besides, without my equipment fully intact, I wouldn't attract a non-neutered male, he would only be looking for a female giving off the fertility scent. So thus, the conundrum. I suppose I can just live vicariously in the realm of imagined love. It would be nice to have a great love affair, an affair to remember kind of love forever. But I have given up hope of ever finding that one great love. And I suppose I am content to live through imagining it, and writing about it, perhaps that is even better than experiencing it. It seems that humans are often disappointed in love once they find it, and those great passions wear off faster than the few minutes it took to take my kittens away from me forever.
Adieu,
Xoxo, Coco
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